Sometimes there’s this blank page staring at me and I have no idea what to write about.
It doesn’t happen often, but it happens every now and then.
Ideas come and go and I cannot hold on to them.

I am not satisfied with them.
I want more of them.
I get frustrated and then –
I stop.

And realize that a blank page is powerful.

In fact, it’s way more powerful than a page already filled with ideas, inspirations, plans and roadmaps.

A blank page is a new beginning.
The beginning that we are rewarded with every morning.
If we’re lucky, that is.

That blank page that allows us to start anew.
Every single time.
To create a new reality,
a new relationship to food,
to begin healing from the inside –
one blank page at a time.

White space is phenomenal.

And do you realize how much you can use it to your advantage?
Do you know that you do not have to repeat what you did yesterday?
That today, this brand-new blank page, can be the beginning of something entirely different?

That you can choose body love today.
That you can choose to eat what you want today.
That you can choose to break out of diet prison today.

Not tomorrow.
Not next week.

This blank page is waiting for you to fill it with meaning.
With love.
With the deep and unwavering sense of your worthiness.

This blank page means that you get to make a choice:

Will you repeat yesterday or will you choose a new life?

Will you re-claim your freedom,
finally begin to own your body
and let go of the need to diet ever again?

Will you eat what you are craving for
instead of always choosing rice cakes over the double fudge chocolate ice-cream that you really want?

Will you eat what you’re hungry for
instead of throwing it away out of fear of losing control?

Will you respect yourself?

Today?

Look at this blank page now, not so blank anymore.
It’s already filled with thoughts and fears and hopes and dreams.
It’s already filled with intentions – conscious and unconscious – that will determine the next 10.000 words.

It’s already being filled –
are you happy with what you’re writing?

Or does it make you scream out in pain?

My mornings, my days, when I was at war with myself,
were already filled with agony before I opened my eyes.

I knew, I just knew that something bad was going to happen,
that something was not going to be alright.

My intentions were all about making life miserable.
It was a feeling that I couldn’t leave behind.

Written on my blank pages.

The pages that really weren’t blank at all.
They were always already filled with shame and fear and guilt.
They were always already filled with numbers.
With tasks I had to do no matter how I felt.

My blank pages were a constant stream of ‘shoulds’ and ‘have tos’, ‘cant’s’ and ‘wont’s’.

Until I began to erase, to let go, to break those beliefs all down.
Line by line, I started to dissolve the truths I had known,
the feelings that had started to paint a reality in black and grey and shadows of my past.

Day after day, line by line,
my pages cleared and soon –
I was free.

No more fear of eating what I want when I want.
No more agony over the exact ratio of my thighs.
No more measuring my self-worth with a number on a scale.

No more constant diet talk.
No more counting of my BMI 20 times a day.
No more excitement after having lost a pound
and no more misery after having it gained back.

Line by line,
I created a life –
out of my blank page that wasn’t blank at all.

Every blank page – even those filled with agony and shame,
brings new hope, new opportunities a new chance to grow and create that shift you need inside.

Every blank page – even yours,
bears the possibility for a different outlook on life, on food, on your body, on love.

Every blank page – especially today,
is the beginning of something special, something amazingly awesome that you already carry inside.

Stop choosing the pages filled with agony and fear
and allow yourself to lose control,
to go all in,
to finally break free from misery.

Stop choosing blackspace instead of going for the white.
The hope.
The freedom you crave.

Stop choosing the heartache
and re-write your life with love.

Stop choosing the same old page that you’ve written a million times before.

Today life is a new page.
Fill it with positive words.
Loving actions,
Foods you like.

Today your body is a blank page.
Love her to pieces.
Ask her for guidance.
Support her with trust.

Today food your weight is a blank page.
Respect it the way it is.
Allow it to exist.
Celebrate it and welcome it with open arms.

Today you are a blank page.
Stop dwelling in the page.
Forcefully hanging on to what was.
Not wanting to face what your heart’s known all along:

That this not the life you are meant to life.
That this is not the dream you’ve harbored when you were a child.
That this is not what your potential is here to build.

That you are wasting your life by living in diet prison
knowing full well that being thin is not what you really want.

You. Are. Wasting. Your. Life.
As did I.
As do millions of women who are hung up on the idea that being thin means being lovable, better than, perfect, happy, healthy, rich, desired and whatever else the media has made us believe.

If being thin really made you happy,
would you have to fight?

If being thin really made you whole,
would you be dead inside?

If being thin really gave you everything you needed,
would you still be crying at night?

Choose a blank page that hugs your soul and quickens the beating of your heart.
Choose a blank page that lights up your eyes,
a blank page that lifts you higher and higher
instead of tearing you apart.

Look at that blank page now-
all full of hope, possibility and LIFE.