When did you eat your last “last supper”?
Was it on Sunday night?
Last month?
On New Year’s Eve?
When did you tell yourself the last time that this was going to be “it”?
The last time you allowed yourself to eat all that you wanted?
The last time you allowed yourself to experience true, real, unadulterated pleasure when eating?
And how fun was it to eat all these forbidden foods one last time?
How thrilling was the knowledge that tomorrow, you’ll finally be strict again, lose weight and change your life for REAL?
Oh, the excitement.
Oh, the joy of knowing that there’d be structure again, safety, the feeling of being in control.
FINALLY.
Another diet.
Although, it wasn’t really a diet, right?
This time, it was all about a lifestyle change.
A total makeover of how you DO life, while totally placing the focus on FOOD, CALORIES, CUTTING OUT THOSE EVIL CARBS.
Or whatever it was you told yourself.
But one last “last supper” had to happen.
Because, after all, you’d never allow yourself to eat these tasty foods again.
No, too bad. They’re evil. Bad. Bad. Bad.
But the taste running through your body. It’s just sooo good.
Tomorrow, though, no more.
That’s it.
Life is going to be different. For ever.
And ever.
And ever.
Yeah, and how long did that diet, oops, lifestyle change last?
How long until you craved those EVIL foods?
How long until you had your first not-so-perfect diet/lifestyle change day?
How long until the excitement started to turn into anxiety?
A day?
Two?
A week?
Maybe slightly longer?
Juuuust a tiny bit, you know?
Oh, I’ve been there.
So many times.
There was a time I started a new diet every other week.
Being really “firm” with myself for 7 loooooooong and horrific days and then bingeing my butt off for an entire week, which led into a new desperate attempting to control my appetite, to lose the weight that was destroying my life (gosh, how wrong I was).
The thing about the last supper is this:
it IS exciting to go on a new diet as it signals hope, change, a new chapter in life.
It IS motivating to start anew, every Monday morning.
It IS oh so fun to have that last binge of experiencing everything you’ll never eat again.
But it’s also soul-destroying.
It’s a way of lying to yourself,
of hurting yourself in ways you’d never hurt anyone else.
That last supper, in the end, is nothing but a punishment for having lived your life.
It’s nothing but a slap in the face for having a human body and liking the taste of food on your tongue.
That last supper signals that you’ve been a BAD human being that needs to be destroyed in order to be seen as GOOD again.
Yup, diets are DESTRUCTIVE and there’s a part of you that knows it, thrives on it, wills it back into your life over and over and over again.
AND you can totally hop off that rollercoaster and start anew.
FOR REAL.
No diets needed.
No lifestyle change that really is nothing but a diet in sight.
No forcing, destroying, denying yourself the pleasure of having a body.
Stop the repeated attempts of restriction and instead of celebrating one last “last supper” after the other, give yourself the gift of real change, real work and real transformation.
Choose a different path.
The one you haven’t traveled on.
It’s scary, I know.
But it’ll be worth it, for sure.
***
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