Calories are one of the biggest enemies that women face in their lives.
Calories haunt you. They keep you up at night and come to you in the wee hours of the morning. They give you a sense of pride or a feeling of utter shame and desperation. If you listen to some very popular trainers and TV personalities, you can only be at peace with your body if you measure yourself by calories.
40 kcals in, 60 kncals out.
100 kcals in, 200 kcals burnt.
You add, you subtract, you start from scratch Maybe I’ve forgotten something? Maybe I’ve added up too much. I’m hungry – surely, I must have a few calories left for tonight, no?
What a destructive, yet so common way to live, no?
If you’re anything like me than you know the calorie count of pretty much any food there is. And if you’re completely like me than you’ve ruined your youth by something as ridiculous as a measurement of energy.
Did calorie counting ever help me love myself more?
No, it only created a constant vicious circle of numbers and a dangerous mixture of self-loathing and self-admiring. I was either doing running on a high or being crushed by a low. Never once was I happy when living by the rules of calories.
Calorie counting may be helpful in some circumstances. For example, when you’re dangerously overweight and you need to lose weight FOR YOUR HEALTH. In that instance, calories can lead you back to a path of healthy eating and healthy living.
The dangerous thing about counting calories, however, is that you can’t take it back. Once you know, you know. And once you’re aware, it’s hard to enjoy food for what it is: something that nourishes you.
Food is not just a means of keeping you alive. Food is delicious, food can be creative, food often creates community. Food is part of life and if you link it to something as dead and depressing as calories, you’re taking all the fun out of eating.
A healthy diet has nothing to do with calories, but everything to do with a healthy mindset. Yes, it’s hard to let go of counting calories; especially if you’ve done it for most of your life. It freaks you out because you’re scared of losing control, of endlessly gaining weight and of never ever being able to make peace with your body.
The truth is, however, that if you let go, you’ll gain freedom and you’ll gain a deeper understanding of your body and its signals. It’s hard – I won’t lie. Especially the beginnings of not counting calories can be overwhelming, but if you keep on going even if you “mess up”, you’ll soon live free as a bird.
Remember, you’re body is actually pretty smart and it is always on your side! [Click to Tweet]
So, generally speaking, calorie counting is bad and a no-go for a happy and love-filled life.
In the comment section, you can share if you’ve ever counted calories and how you felt doing so; have you gained or lost self-confidence and self-worth by measuring your food intake in such a ridiculous way? Be honest with yourself and really dig deep.
Check out Love Yourself Friday Edition #33 Calorie-Counting: Good or Bad? on Youtube.
This is a real struggle for me. As you say you can’t un-know what you know and those numbers swirl around in my head unbidden. I’m diabetic as well so it becomes complex in that I do *need* to know some numbers in order to control that. I am hoping, and trusting, that once I have a better self image and worth that the numbers will lose their power and judgment.
Oh yes, that does add another layer of complexity to it. Maybe one thing you can do is to check in with yourself every time you start counting and ask yourself if it comes from a place of health or not. Being totally honest with yourself helps always. Hugs
That’s great advice – I do have a tendency to check out of myself – I will try that for sure. Thanks!
Awesome. Let me know how it goes. <3
Oh, I like the new header! Let’s see, I’m useless at calorie counting. It’s more work than I want to put into being healthy. I work out, I try to make the healthier food choice, but I don’t want to keep track of calories. I have too much in my head already. But I do pay attention to the nutrition labels when I shop and, if I can’t pronounce the first several ingredients, I put it back.
I definitely agree that listening to your body goes further than calorie counting any day. And it’s less stressful.
Thank you, Yoneco. 🙂 I love love love that perspective. It’s actually quite refreshing and definitely so much healthier. Also, I’m with you when it comes to looking at the nutrition labels. There’s so much stuff in our food these days that it pays off to take a second to look at the ingredients. <3
counting…. ah, that is a good one. I never went on a “diet”. I never had to diet, as most people do. I just saw myself as needing to lose.. I was a gymnast so I was muscular, I was a swimmer too… and with my personal background, my views were distorted at best on how I saw myself, and it didn’t match up to what was there at all. and by my twenties, it got weird, and just kept getting crazier… and didn’t take long to know every count on everything. and no, once you know, you can’t un know anything. and I am still counting. yes, anne, I still count, everything, every day. my dr and therapist feel safest with me counting because they know if they give me a set amount of calories to eat a day, and I sign a contract to eat them, they know I will not break that, and I will follow through. I don’t trust not having counts for things… things without labels.. cookouts etc. things not measured. I am not willing to “eyeball” for fear I may be too far off. I know it is a control thing. Im working on that….there are some things I don’t measure, but I know I am pretty stinking close to perfect on eyeballing servings on… like my ice cream at home. and some times I add a little more and don’t count it. 🙂 I am trying to bend a little bit at a time… it is just really hard when you’ve been at this for decades….. people say you can let it go…. my therapist says for some yes. others no. she says that for some that have been trapped for so long it is almost impossible, but maybe not… she said we will just have to see. but she said what is important to recognize is that I am trying and I AM WILLING to occasionally eat things that do not have counts at all … and that is huge. I just wing it that day. 🙂 and I haven’t died yet from doing that!!! hee hee!
Huge realization, Karen. No, you haven’t died and you won’t die when you do it next time either. Life will only get better. Yes, maybe you’ll have to live with it forever, but maybe you don’t. However, if you keep on fighting, your chances of breaking free and finally making peace will only grow. If you give up, then you’ll have to live with it forever. You’re strong and you have a great base on which you can now build your healthy, happy life. Big hus and so much love
For the last year, I have counted every calorie I have eaten. It’s been great! I love having 100% control over what I eat, because I want the best health possible – and I still want to be able to eat junk food! My rule is this. Add a consistent staple diet every day of fruit and vegetables. Then eat what you want in the calorie space that remains. I’ve gone from 23% fat to 7.1%, and I still get to eat what I want, when I want. Unless I’ve used up my allowance for the day. In which case, I could easily eat more – if I wanted at that point to start storing fat. In total, it probably takes me a 2 minute commitment each day to track the calories – with a massive health benefit to boot. So I praise calorie counting all the way. Especially as it allows me to add in junk food too!
Hey David, I’m happy to hear that calorie counting is working fabulously for you. You seem to thrive on it and as long as it gives you the freedom you want in your life, it’s perfect. 🙂