Whenever you gain weight, there’s often a fear of dealing with judgment about weight gain from others.
Sometimes, this fear feels even worse than the weight gain itself.
One of the first thoughts after realizing that your pants don’t fit anymore might be: What will X, Y, or Z think? You imagine them noticing, gossiping behind your back, and assuming you’re lazy, uncontrolled, or have let yourself go.
There’s a massive amount of shame attached to not matching society’s unrealistic beauty ideals and having a body that changes over time.
That’s why it’s so important to build a certain level of resiliency, to find self-confidence and self-worth in who you are and not in your body.
The truth is that there are a gazillion different reasons why we might gain weight and all of them are valid. The truth also is that your body doesn’t define who you are. It’s only you who can put a ton of value on your body and therefor decide that you’re defined by your shape and looks.
So, how can you deal with the judgement about your weight gain without losing yourself and falling back into diet prison?
The FIIFT Method: 5 Ways to Navigate Judgment About Weight Gain
When the fear of judgement about your weight gain gets too much, try this strategy. By using The FIIFT Method—a set of five simple strategies—you can build resilience, self-confidence, and peace in the face of criticism, whether it’s real or imagined.
What is the FIIFT Method?
The FIIFT Method stands for Feel, Investigate, Ignore, Fake, Talk—five practical strategies to help you handle the fear of judgment about weight gain. Each step is designed to empower you to reconnect with your self-worth, challenge negative beliefs, and move forward with confidence.
Investigate the Belief: I am being judged for my weight gain
Do you actually know that others are judging you or is it all in your head?
Even if you know that your friends have gossiped about others before, how do you know they’re actually doing it now? Do you have evidence? Proof? Or is it all a figment of your imagination?
You are the one who hurts yourself the most and often, you only want to believe others judge you, so you can continue to beat yourself up (yup, that’s how our brains work). If that’s the case, go deep in your questioning and see if there’s any merit to what you feel in your body and think in your mind.
If you realize that it was all in your head, brilliant. You’re free.
If you find proof that it’s true, you can take action and continue to go down the list.
Ignore It
One of the most powerful ways to deal with the judgment about your weight gain is to ignore it. This might mean, limiting your conversations with people who you know are judgemental and superficial.
If you are the one who always compares herself and the most painful judgment is happening in your own mind, then shut down all social media channels, don’t click on the news reports about celebrities’ newly slimmed down bodies or their beautiful beach vacation photos and instead engage in body positive activities.
This takes willpower and commitment, but it’s worth it.
Fake it
So, you’re walking down the hall and you believe you feel the darts in your back, people are whispering (or so you think) and you wish you could go back to the time when you believed that by closing your eyes, you’re invisible. Remember that? Oh, how blissful that was.
Well, you can’t and so the only thing left to do except for breaking down is to fake it. Put your head up, your shoulders back, and strut as if you were the most beautiful and confident Self.
Just do it. Be confident. Fake it. You’ll see that the judgment about your weight gain will soon subside or you will stop noticing it!
Have the Conversation
If there’s one particular person whose judgment you fear, then it’s time for a real heart-to-heart conversation. Yes, this is scary – I never said learning to accept your body was easy -, but you can do it.
Tell that person what you’re feeling, what you’re scared of, what you believe you notice. Be kind and honest. And then listen to what that person has to say. Really listen and don’t disbelieve when she tells you that you’re wrong.
Feel the Feeling
This one is the biggie. In the end, you have to feel the fear. You have to scan your body and see where it sits, what it feels like, looks like, sounds like. You have to really, really listen to it on an intimate level and sit with it for minutes, sometimes hours.
When the feeling gets too overwhelming, breathe into it. Just 90 seconds can help with that. Take deep, long breaths and breathe into that area of your body that feels the pain.
Keep on practicing and you’ll transform this feeling from fear to love.
Why the FIIFT Method Works
The FIIFT Method gives you a practical framework to face judgment with resilience and self-compassion. It allows you to shift your focus away from others’ opinions and toward your own sense of worth. By practicing these steps, you can navigate judgment with grace and build a healthier relationship with your body and yourself.
Final Words on Dealing with Judgment About Your Weight Gain
Dealing with judgment about weight gain, whether real or imagined, is never easy. The fear can feel overwhelming, but it doesn’t have to define you. By challenging your beliefs, setting boundaries, and reconnecting with your self-worth, you can transform the way you navigate these situations. Remember, your value isn’t determined by the size of your body but by the unique, incredible person you are.
What about you?
What strategies have you found helpful when dealing with judgment about weight gain? Share your experiences in the comments—I’d love to hear your perspective. And if you’re ready to take the next step in building resilience and self-confidence, explore my program on self-love and embodiment. Let’s work together to help you feel empowered, strong, and unapologetically yourself. Click here to learn more!
