I am bored with your excuses.
So so bored.
Seriously.
It’s lame to continue saying that you cannot do it, that you’ll never love your body, that you’ll only be happy if you lose the weight, that others might be able to accept who they are but you certainly don’t.
I am bored with you telling me that you cannot commit to healing yourself because you don’t have the time.
I am bored with you telling me that you cannot commit to journaling because it’s not working for you anyway.
I am bored with your choice to blame others for why you’re still stuck.
It’s LAME.
And I am so tired of hearing that.
Because the truth is that nobody but YOU has the power to change your story. Nobody but YOU has the power to heal your body image.
Nobody but YOU has the RESPONSIBILITY to work through your crap and make it out the other way.
And listen, I have done the same for ages. I blamed my circumstances, found excuses (I am not sick enough, I don’t have the money, I don’t have the time, it’ll never work anyway, I don’t have the support I need, it’s not worth it, bla, bla, bla) and got so sick that I almost DIED: physically, spiritually and emotionally.
It took me a decade from realizing that I had a huge problem to doing something about it because I found one excuse after the other and seriously, I just didn’t want to heal.
And when I look back now, I want to take myself by the hand, give that little Anne a kick in the ass and – compassionately – throw her off the cliff to heal herself.
I FREAKING WASTED 14 YEARS OF MY LIFE. I skipped my youth entirely and rotted away in my room because I was scared of life, of my body, of food.
I blamed everyone but me in order to NOT HAVE TO DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT. I didn’t listen to those who desperately wanted to help me, thought everyone just wanted me to GROW FAT (which I thought was the worst thing that could ever happen to me) and hurt me in some messed up way.
I spun stories, I lied to myself, I lied to everyone, just so I could continue to diet, be thin, eat, purge, over-exercise and waste away.
Until eventually, I had to help myself.
I had to stop making excuses and start being a woman.
I had to accept my circumstances and begin to work WITH them, take responsibility for my life and figure out how to make it through the terrifying change that loving your body is.
And because I made it out, I know that you can do it too.
But you HAVE TO stop finding excuses.
You HAVE TO stop being complacent and staying in your safe zone and actually DO something about it.
Do NOT wait any longer.
Because life won’t give you a second chance. This is it. This is all you have and you have the WORLD at your feet – all you need to do is own your fear, be radically honest with yourself and go heal.
It won’t be easy.
It won’t be over in a day.
It won’t be a straight line to bliss.
But it’ll be worth it.
It’ll be GRAND.
It’ll be FUN.
It’ll be all you’ve ever wanted.
… once you’re on the other side.
And while you’re in the drenches, dance with your fears.
Dance with your heartache.
Dance with your anger, your pain, your tendency to blame.
Dance with all of it until you’ve embraced it and moved on WITH it, never leaving your fears behind but integrated them into who you want to be.
That’s the ONLY way to
– not be terrified of the holidays that are coming up.
– not use your body as a scapegoat.
– fully live your beautiful life.
– rock your body like you mean it.
– stop waking up thinking of your body without even opening your eyes.
– no binging until you can’t breathe.
– not restricting until you feel dizzy.
– not watch others eat while you are on a diet.
– not deny yourself every pleasure there is because of the fear of overdoing it.
– feel your feelings – all of them.
– not waste all that’s been given to you.
It’s pretty much the only way to live a good life and I trust that you want to live a good one, no?
So, stop the excuses and instead proactively change your life.
<3
