One day you feel great about your body, the next day you feel homeless.
One day you like your legs, the next day you wish you could cut them off.
One day you look in the mirror and are confident, the next day you hate everything you see.
It’s a constant up and down and when you wake up, you never know what kind of day it’s going to be… until you put on clothes, look in the mirror or see a photo of yourself.
Then, all hell can break lose or the wonders of the world can unfold right in front of you.
It’s a game with no rules.
Can you relate?
It’s frustrating, isn’t it?
This constant feeling of having to be on high alert, of changing, digging deep, wanting to figure out why you feel great on some days and so sad and ashamed on others. These highs and lows not only play with your mind and your nerves, they make you feel like you’re drowning in the seas of body acceptance.
Why do others seem to have it all together so fast? And why do I feel like a defiant child changing my attitude every day?
It’s easy to go discouraged by these seemingly uncontrollable emotions and to be tempted to jump right back into the world of dieting and food obsession.
But it’s just as easy – albeit counterintuitive – to use these tumultuous feelings towards your personal growth and healing.
Say what? Yes, you can use these beautiful challenges to heal your messed up relationship with yourself, your body and your weight.
All you have to do is make a few changes in your thinking.
Accept it as a challenge
Here’s the thing: Body-acceptance work is a challenge in and of itself. It’s a challenge that won’t be over tomorrow or even next year. It’s a challenge that unfolds new levels all the time. And that’s the beauty of this work. You get to dig deeper and deeper and deeper and get to know yourself more than others will ever do in all of their life or lifetimes.
Not only are you allowing yourself to learn how to be fully you, but you’re also opening up inner worlds that you never knew were there. Granted, you may not want to know these parts of you, but what’s the point of them being there then? What’s the point of being a wonderfully deep and whole and complex being if you are not willing to explore all you’ve got?
There is none.
So, accept that it’s there and your body image is just one of the many doorways into your soul and deeper inner explorative work.
Be vulnerable
Allow yourself to fully and completely vulnerable with yourself and your confidantes. Don’t share your misery with everyone in the world (not everybody deserves to hear your story after all), but choose your dream support team. Be picky here as this is such a sensitive area and choose only people you completely trust.
Then, begin your work. Talk about what’s going on. Share your fears, your wins, your hiccups and your confusions. Talk about it all without feeling ashamed or censoring yourself. Know that in a way, all of us women struggle with the same issues. You’re never ever alone.
Brené Brown says it best: Shame hates it when we reach out and tell our story.
So, be brave and share your story.
See the message behind it
Every single time you feel bad about what you see in your mirror or in a photo, there’s a hidden message to your beautiful Self. Every. Single. Time.
The messages are deep and vast and they can point to simply or complex issues. Sometimes it’s just a person you’ve seen on TV that triggered some insecure part of you. Other times it may be a huge fight with your partner or a loss in your family.
If you notice these ups and downs, ask yourself ‘why’? Why are they here? What’s happening? What’s different today? What am I scared of (shame and discomfort are closely linked to fear!)?
You may not always be able to get to your answer in a second, but you’ll eventually get there. Notice the subtle shifts in yourself, your monthly cycle, the moon, the energy in your household and more.
Remember that the body is not a constant
Life floats. It rises and ebbs. Its water takes you on a journey around the globe with beautiful sunshine and ruthless thunderstorms. Sometimes you’re swimming in love and then, you’re sinking in pain.
These words open one of the favorite blog posts of mine and they still ring true more than 3 years after I published them. Life is never ever still. There are always ups and downs and the same is true for your body image.
The more you can begin to accept that fact completely and wholeheartedly, the more you’ll be able to make peace with the reality that your body and your body image will never ever be the same from one day to the next.
There psychological, sociopsychological and emotional reasons for this (see above) and it’s all completely normal – though maybe not fair.
But would you leave your partner just because your emotions run wild a few times in your life? Would you abandon your child because it sometimes enrages you or makes you want to scratch out your own eyes? Would you lose faith in your pet just because it runs into your home all wet and dirty, annoying you and making you have to clean the entire first floor? Would you?
Everything changes – one day we’re good, the next day we’re not. One day we’re fine, the next day we want to run and then, we want to stay because it’s all so glorious.
Don’t give up on your body image, just because it challenges you to step up more and more, making you raise your awareness and your comfort zone.
Give it one more chance. Every single day.
If you practice these 4 pillars, you’ll be well equipped and ready to release even the deepest fears about being judged, judging yourself, being shamed, shaming yourself, looking great to others and yourself and simply wanting to fit in and please your eye.
You so got this. Simply continue your work.
PS: Is your heart tugging at you, letting you know that it’s time to step up and shine fiercely?
There’s no better time than today to start loving yourself. The longer you wait, the more of your life you’re missing out on and you know, deep down, that it could be so much better for you. And that it should be better and you’re ready to start that change now.
Book your discovery session with me here. Your life is worth it. 
