The other day, I was having one of those days.

You know, a day when I was just stubbornly determined to feel miserable about my life.

I curled up in bed at noon with a jar of peanut butter, a bottle of Smirnoff (yup. Don’t look at me that way, I’m already embarrassed.) and watched a TV.

I had good reason to feel down (join my newsletter to hear about the behind the scenes stuff), but still, my behavior was ridiculous.

And then my mom Facebook messaged me: Why don’t you go to the Statue of Liberty?

That’s when it hit me: I’m in freaking NYC. I can go to the Statue of Liberty just because I want to. No long flight, no expensive hotel, just a few minutes on the metro and I’m there, seeing her.

To say that this was a wake-up call would be an understatement. I had been so determined to only see the negative that I completely zoned out and forgot about all the positive, the exciting and the amazing parts of my life.

The next day, I was back on track – not healed – but committed to being positive, living and seeing how freaking lucky I am.

The truth is that too often we walk through life with blindfolds on, don’t we?

We focus on all the things we don’t have, but we forget about all the things we do have. We focus on being unhappy because we don’t have that house, that job or that partner and we forget that we can be happy right here. Right now.

We can be happy with what we have or don’t have. With the people we hug or don’t hug. And with the emotions we feel or don’t feel.

Being happy is our choice and creating happiness is in our hands. [Click to tweet]

Yet, most of us have adopted a lack mentality that causes a series of roadblocks on our way to happiness and fulfillment.

Let’s talk about them and find out how we can clear the way.

Roadblock #1: You’re waiting to find health.

Health plays a major role in the creation of happiness. If you’re unhealthy, you’ll be and feel miserable; that’s a fact. Now, health means something different for everyone and only you can figure out what it means to you.

But if you’re swimming in a sea of bad food choices and you’re stubbornly resisting any kind of movement (aka. dancing, playing, being outside, swimming, having fun), you will feel bad about yourself more often than not.

Solution #1: Observe and change.

Observe your eating and fitness choices over the course of a week and then decide what you want to change. Remember the magical rule of 3: Eat 3 meals and 3 snacks a day and work out at least 3 times a week and you’ll feel more energized and happy within the span of a short few weeks.

Roadblock #2: You’re waiting for the perfect timing.

Guess what, there will never be the perfect moment. Ever. Unless, that is, you create it. When I moved to NYC, there were all kinds of things standing in my way, but I made my move happen because I knew this was the necessary next step in my life. I had help, yes, lots of it, and I wasn’t too proud to ask for it.

If you want something bad enough, you will find a way and you alone will determine that perfect moment – not the other way around.

Solution #2: Take action.

Think about one project you’ve always wanted to start, one country you’ve always wanted to visit or one risk you’ve always wanted to take. Then map out specific action steps that will take you towards making that dream, trip or project come true. Everything is doable if you cut it into tiny steps, ask for help and take action. So, go ahead, dream big and then start small.

Roadblock #3: You’re waiting for the money.

I am guilty of this. Oh, so guilty. I keep on waiting for my business to be (more) successful because then… Then what? What will change? Will I buy a new computer? Travel more? Give more to others? Yes. But will this make me happier? No, I don’t think so.

Sure, more money will give you more opportunities in life and maybe you’ll worry less, but it won’t ever make you happier.

The true sources of happiness aren’t in money; they’re in the people you surround yourself with, the choices you make for yourself, the work you do or the hobbies you have.

Money is a great asset to have, but it’s not going to make an unhappy person happier – this I promise.

Solution #3: Brainstorm.

Find at least one thing that is making you happy and is not related to money. I bet it won’t take you long to come up with a huge list of non-material gratitudes.

Roadblock #4: You’re waiting for the right partner.

This is the worst roadblock because expecting someone else to fill your inner emptiness is too much to ask for and it’s a certain way to relationship disaster. Nobody can make you happy but yourself.

Solution #4: Date yourself; literally.

Take yourself out on a few dates. Go to the movies, have a cup of coffee with yourself, treat yourself to a massage or take yourself to a delicious dinner at an expensive restaurant – all dressed up. Get comfortable being with yourself and get to know yourself. The more often you do it, the more you’ll see what an honor it is to be spending the rest of your life with yourself.

Roadblock #5: You’re waiting for yourself.

Maybe you’re waiting for yourself to become more self-confident, to figure out what you actually want in life and who you truly are. Maybe you’re waiting to like yourself for the first time ever. Well, again, it’s in your own hands to change that. You can empower yourself and crawl out of your shell, unleashing the phenomenal woman you are.

Solution #5: Find yourself.

Spend a couple of months journaling daily and digging deep. Ask yourself the big questions of life and find out what your true answers are. Through the act of writing, you can strip away all the layers of pretend and all the opinions of others and by sticking to a daily journal routine, you’ll soon come to the core of who you truly are.

Want more? 

The ultimate secret to a tremendously happy life is to turn the mentality of lack around and create a mentality of abundance.

Practice gratitude in all areas of your life and your happiness level will increase by at least 25% over the course of a mere 3 weeks. [Click to Tweet]

Trust me, you can create happiness. Give these solutions an honest chance and see for yourself.

Your turn: in which areas are you waiting for happiness and what is keeping you from being happy in your life?